after Sonya Vatomsky

The saying goes that revenge is a chilled soup. So, start with 2 whole Spanish yellow onions. Chop down into ¼ inch pieces slowly, why waste salt when tears are local harvests. Season to taste. Place into a stainless steel 8 quart pot, heat the olive oil, let it burn. When you really feel the heat in you turn to sweetened sugar you’ll know the best way to exact it. Add as much garlic as you can stand, diced down into slices from head to foot. It would be so nice to dice whomever hurt us into slices, head to foot. I most often think of dissecting my abusers when cooking. Practice your knife against 6 bell peppers of any color, add to the heat. I think I’ll know myself satiated when hell freezes over, add a large can of peeled San Marzano tomatoes. You may want to wear gloves, but if you don’t remember not to touch the eyes of anyone you love as you quarter and dice 4 jalapenos. There is something to be said about pain so lasting you learn it’s first name, it’s star sign. My abuser is a Capricorn, I salt and pepper the soup to taste. A pinch of cayenne, a pinch of paprika, a large pinch of cumin. A pinch against your thigh hard enough to indent the skin, enough to pain your past self into remembering No and Stop. Fold parsley, cilantro, and chives into your fingers, mince fine. After the mixture reduces down into the pot half a cups worth, pour into a blender and pulse until creamy. Let sit and cool. Think about the clean up now, but don’t. Serve chilled with a burnt slice of baguette. Salt and pepper to taste.

AEON GINSBERG (they/them) is a trans writer and performer from Baltimore City, MD. They are author of the chapbooks Until The Cows Come Home (Elation Press, 2016) and Loathe/Love/Lathe (Nostrovia! Press, 2017). Alain is a taurus, a barista, a bartender, and a bitch.