Tabs open on your screen right now:

Email1; Calendar; Email2; Hillary Clinton and the Populist Revolt; ESPN Fantasy Basketball (2nd place at the moment!); Google Maps map of St. Petersburg, Florida; NYT: The Right Way to Resist Trump

If you had to brag about yourself:
I wouldn’t

Your writer crush:
Annie Liontas

Favorite lyric:
I smile when I’m angry / I cheat and I lie / I do what I have to do / To get by / But I know what is wrong / And I know what is right / And I’d die for the truth / In my secret life

Any place in the world:
St. Petersburg, Russia

Best breakfast:

Favorite online places right now:

Sweetest thing:
Atkins Farm Cider Donuts (no sugar)

Your rituals (writing or not):

Least impressive thing about you:
Impossible to choose among vast array of underwhelming attributes

Favorite space to write:
Anywhere the radio turns on

What should we know:
The Higgs boson exists, and Donald Trump has the nuclear codes.

Guilty literary pleasure:
Lil’ Stevie King

Best book nobody talks about:
Dance With Snakes by Horacio Castellanos Moya

Character (TV, book, movie) you most identify with:
Toss up between Akaky Akakievich and Fuckhead

Last time you lied:
Three lines ago.

The lie:
Lil’ Stevie King. Truth is I haven’t read anything by him in years; I don’t actually have a guilty literary pleasure. Who has time to read not good shit?

Question you secretly want to be asked:
What radio?

The answer:
You know what radio.


Jeff Parker is the author of Where Bears Roam The Streets: A Russian Journal. With Annie Liontas he edited A Manner of Being: Writers on Their Mentors, and with Pasha Malla he compiled Erratic Fire, Erratic Passion. He teaches in the MFA program at the University of Massachusetts at Amherst.